This is such a powerful image. My mother when I was just a child used to tell my friends and even my cousin once (that I know of) that I had a potbelly and made fun of my body to them. She’d say it behind my back and inevitably they’d come tell me what she said about me.
I remember my father showing me pictures of slender women from dating sites when I was a teenager and asking me if they were too fat for him to go out with or what I thought their weight was like in real life.
As you can imagine, I was incredibly body dysmorphic and was so unhealthily consumed with my body image at a very young age. I couldn’t get it perfect enough. I thought if I could just fix “this one last thing”, I would be loved.
Which led to a pattern of dating narcissistic men because I never knew my value or worth beyond my waistline.
(P.S. although I healed from these emotional issues thanks to the work I now do, just this year reading Proverbs 31, a whole other realm of value and worth through who God says I am opened up for me. I even saw the sneaky ways I still let men treat me poorly and closed those doors.)
I remember at one point in my life a long time ago, I was soooooo tiny, my boyfriend at the time said to me “you have to start eating something or people are going to talk!” He was a rockstar trying to hide a cocaine addiction so I suppose a shrinking girlfriend wasn’t good for his image. But you know what my response was when he said this out of total concern (for his image)? My response was “THANK YOU!” How sick is that??? It just fell out of my mouth. I was HAPPY he thought I looked too skinny!
I am so blessed I healed from all of the emotional issues I had. But y’all, more people are hurting in this world than are happy.
So many people wishing they were someone different so that they could be worth love.
Lies! Lies!! Lies!!!
Why do I “air my dirty laundry” on social media? In hopes to to help even just one person step out of suffering and into love and joy.
I share this for 3 reasons.
1. If you’re reading this and hold any self consciousness, body dysmorphia, or any issues with value or worth – you are not alone! You have no idea how common this is. I hear it all the time! The lies of shame want you to think it’s only you, IT’S NOT!! But also know, those lies are just that… LIES!!! In our society it is more common to be self conscious than it is to be confident or feel worth love. Can you believe that? And no, it’s not okay. Let’s make sure to speak life into our human brothers and sisters!
2. No matter how mild or extreme the internal issues are, you can be free of the emotional suffering. (Reach out if you need help. It’s what I do!)
3. And if you want to take that even farther and truly step fully into your worth, just open up a Bible and read about who God says you are. The lies can’t live within you when you truly know who you are (your identity) in God. For any ladies putting up with being treated poorly, read Proverbs 31. You are far more precious than rubies.
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